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[sagikkun]

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[sagikkun]

You are tenacious.

And all the time, I suppose. I do a lot of things others think I shouldn't, but that I believe I must.

[temporicide]

Sometimes tenacity feels like demonic possession, I can't lie. (Not that I've been demonically possessed. I don't think that's possible.)

Does it ever bother you? When they get upset.

[sagikkun]

No? Nobody's ever accused me of being possessed, I think perhaps because that implies a lack of accountability. Possibly it's more easily believed that I'm the demon doing the possessing.

But that sounds like a lot of work.

And no, it doesn't.

( Because obsessing over and curating a bad reputation is totally a chill and normal thing to do! )

[temporicide]

Do you want people to believe you have that power? Something demonic. Even if it's just metaphorical.

It bothers me sometimes. Maybe I should study, get better at not minding.

[sagikkun]

I don't mind using any kind of reputation to my advantage.

( Although recently there have been very specific cases where it has hurt, a little. He's learning that. )

How do people perceive you, then? That it bothers you?

[temporicide]

Kind of depends on the perspective, I guess. But yeah. Some of it I've earned. Some of it I didn't.

The stuff you don't earn is harder to weaponize, right? Or at least I think so.

[sagikkun]

Ah, not really, in my case.

The things people believe on me are usually based on hearsay, rumours, nothing actually real. It used to be startling how easily people allowed themselves nudged into a stance without anything concrete to stand on. Now I just use it.

[temporicide]

I want to know how to do that, too. To not let it take root.

Does it cost you anything, do you think?

[sagikkun]

Only the cost of my eternal soul.

( Immediately after: )

Kidding. That's long gone. But I do think it takes a certain amount of distance between yourself and others. You have to learn how to separate yourself.

[temporicide]

The whole thing, huh?

But you're probably right. That's why I can't do it well. I don't have a good shell the way other people do. Everything everyone feels or thinks goes into me too easily, and then it stays there. It sticks.

[sagikkun]

Ah, I have no way of teaching you to defend against that. Only a warning that you might need to find a way to let some of it out before it subsumes you. The road to hell, good intentions, you know how it is.

[temporicide]

I know. I try to, even when there's too much. Everybody needs an outlet. You have yours, right?

But that's why the gods invented dancing! And really loud music.

[sagikkun]

Fast cars.

That's mine. Though I'm sure music and dancing is a far more acceptable route.

[temporicide]

Unless the music gets you arrested, right? But I like cars, too. They're so pragmatic where I'm from. It's all about surviving the winter. So I like when they're for fun... and going fast.

You ever get scared of crashes?

[sagikkun]

That's half the thrill.

But I'm better than that, I merely like the speed.

[temporicide]

What's your ride? I'm not the car guy in the family, but I know a little.

me frantically googling bc i am not a car guy either ahsdj

[sagikkun]

Currently? A corvette. A C7. But I have a few. Some practical, some less so.

fake it til u make it (otherwise known for me as 'copying what someone on reddit says')

[temporicide]

Now that is fast.

Have you ever flown a helicopter? I think you'd like it.

ah yes, that is where they keep the sacred texts.

[sagikkun]

I think that's a little too close to being a daredevil. And I think my niece would be jealous.

the last semi-honest place on the internet....

[temporicide]

So she's the real daredevil in the family.

[sagikkun]

You could say that.

Do you have family? You mentioned a brother in law school. How is he finding it?

sorry for delays, my rl is eating me atm!

[temporicide]

I have 2 brothers
4 sisters
1 dad
1 aunt (and two cousins)
2 grandparents
3 nieces
1 nephew
And a partridge in a pear tree. They all live together in the same compound except my aunt and cousins, my law school brother (no school out there), and my married sister who's too bougie for the bush.

I think he likes it. It's hard to say. School is easy for most of my siblings, so I think the real work will begin when he gets a job. He wants to be a public defender, so he'll have a lot of it!

i'll backtag into the sun so do not worry at all

[sagikkun]

That's quite the family. I can only imagine the noise.

And it's a difficult career choice, but rewarding. If he has the right temperament he'll do fine.

♡♡

[temporicide]

I think most of the noise is me historically. To be fair to the rest of them

I think he does. I hope so. You ever meet somebody whose heart is so good you feel a little embarrassed about your own? Or maybe not embarrassed, but something, by comparison. Aware.

[sagikkun]

I know what you mean.

( He's sure it doesn't really have an impact on him. Or at least that's what he tells himself. Kim Gaon's heart in comparison to Yohan's withered own is ... something. )

Your brother might get lucky, maybe the rot hasn't quite spread to where he is yet.